pilderwasser

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the transition dance through repetition town

March 12, 2010

A couple of 60 degree days in February   March
like little tickling teasers under the chin
before the punchline in the gut  when weather
comes back to where it should be
like Kirk R Dungan said
it’s a nice day for a white winter 
but an indian summer sounds better
meanwhile  the guy with the camera that costs
more than you made in 2009        is
taking pictures of club-foot pigeons
as well as his wife pointing at the same
allover the sidewalk   dance the transition dance
between vehicle and pedestrian
hop the curb accordingly           off or on
what’s the problem officer
with a mouth full of peanut butter
a preemptive strike       said Steve Younger
box 350   Boston MA    02134
send it to Zoom
jump     
take the bull by the horns
take it to Two Union by 2:30
then do it again     and      again
another ride on the burn-out cycle
cruising through repetition town
you’ve been down this road before
more than once
no need to read the signs
you can feel it
copy?               copy
the double-edged sword cuts both ways    
but today it’s the wrong way


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a quality of life issue

March 11, 2010

Milkshake photo
one brief shining moment
a checkpoint on the long and winding road
that is the lifespan of a T-shirt


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gray skies are gonna clear up

March 10, 2010

 99 44/100% sure

Blu skies  smiling at me


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what would Scott Mathauser do?

March 9, 2010

 in the absence of anything important
petty little details take on weight    and
masquerade as meaningful

high-speed shimmy downhill squeal
eye watering  gut punching  choad checking
jibber jabber  brake chatter  Scott Mathauser
 
onto the real dog & pony show
straight from the can cold
over stale dry white rice cakes

robot-pimped all day everyday
pushed to the edge of the uncanny valley
four percentage points from full-on zombie

tweaked just off-center analog AM radio
what would Walla Walla Washington do
look to the alien bovine balloons

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...I won't do what you tell me

March 8, 2010

painted by numbers into a corner
square-pegged into a career   for years

playing along  playing the game
inside the lines    well before deadlines
on time    on schedule   on the clock
by the book   check the calendar

seven years went under the bridge   then seven more  
before Stella got her groove back up front

the son of derivative part two
keeps them coming back

the unmistakable scent   
hotdog water wafting       boiling over
burnt crust grilled cheese
bologna has a first name  
extra ketchup on the side   

from the side of the road
to the top of the toaster oven
it looks so much bigger out of context

what seems to be the problem
as plenty of symptoms show up
multiple zippers pulled up
stacked up on the Adam’s apple
layered up cold   like tangy guacamole
recently expired in a grocery store deli  
dip between the refried beans and sour cream 

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Hobson's Choice

March 6, 2010

Today is the day I made an investment in your future by purchasing a fresh batch of American Apparel T-shirts in an attempt to single-handedly revive the economy. The rest is up to you. So tell two friends to tell two friends and then send money because consumer confidence is thawing out this spring sprouting up through the topsoil like a poppy.

mauve  lapis  grass  poppy  baby-blue  gold  sangria. These are the colors of your new favorite shirts in the morning, when we rise. Switched-up for the return customers that want something different in their dresser and not just another black bike shirt.

You and you and you can always use a new shirt because things wear out and sometimes you get shitwhistled and destroy your favorite shirt by stretching it over the head of Chief Seattle in the name of Matt Case.

 

checkout the t-shirt page


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kilograms per cubic meter (kg/m³)

March 5, 2010

"too much is never enough, it's always too much"

--Daniel E. Murray


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a time and place for white cable housing

March 4, 2010

a journey of 1000 miles begins with
it’s always the last place you look
that carrot on a string that keeps you going
day-old chicken salad sandwich hold the mayo
hold the chicken between your knees
hold it down    keep it together    or
let it break down into five easy pieces
expectations lowered back to sea level
expectorations return to street level
one loogie at a time

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forklift

March 3, 2010

it’s all over but the hangover
second-day socks expired
turned inside out and not quite right like
recycled bread sacks painted labels peeling
flaking off into lunches packed for loved ones
to enjoy six hours from now more or less
twist ties tied getting by
making do over due doo-doo
clear as a three dollar bill
standing by until I need to sit down
Two Union near the artificial waterfall
to the sound of falling water
and the smell of bleach   too
easy to see the lack of efficiency
redundancy    I have to pee
move to Monorail for more coffee
table rusty hose clamp clamped
around a shaky leg   shake a leg
working copies to C-203 ASAP
fork lift and don’t forget to breathe


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disclosure of possible primary witnesses

March 2, 2010

take a second swipe at the first impression

 


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there must be a pony in here somewhere

February 28, 2010

Where everything is a sunny breezy smooth and easy bike ride away from everything else

Where it’s OK to horse around while riding because there must be a pony in there somewhere

Where working means riding a bike and horsing around means riding a bike

Where a bag full of beer is much lighter and much more important than a bag full of law books

Where it doesn’t matter how you get there or when you get there or if you actually arrive at all

Where there are no copies to conform so relax and don’t worry about calling to confirm

Where the judges do not want 3-ring binders full of courtesy copies

Where drivetrains are silently efficiently effectively frictionless

Where spoke tension is uniform

Where nobody speaks the same language but everybody understands

Where the Sunday NY Times is delivered by cherubic children on bicycles and it doesn’t get stolen off your porch

Where you can wash your hair with dish soap and wash your dishes with hand soap

Where the gravitational pull of predictability is comforting like a magnetic attraction or a landmark used to get your bearings and not just the same old rote route rut routine that becomes overbearing

Where

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27.5 days later

February 27, 2010

The past five days of what some would call a workweek collectively literally a slow leak in more ways than one a hard row to hoe figuratively let me count the ways today I do not want to ride or even touch a bike practically however we do not have a choice on this as we do not own or flex a zip car and specifically the last thing I want to do today is fix a flaccid flat tire after riding it out for 40.33 hours at Dog & Pony Legal Messengers every day fulltime and not just 3 or 4 or when I fucking feel like it and the second to last thing I want to do today on this misty Saturday is ride my bike to Magnuson Park to buy some blown-out chamois skinsuits or some gently-worn brake pads or some shark-finned chainrings or some long-reach dual pivots for my girlfriend’s bike for the day when she’s ready to ditch the 27” wheels and say hello to 700c.  See.  This is my February.

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onesie

February 26, 2010

This is my nephew Hunter Pilder sporting a pilderwasser onesie in the Eastern time zone. Who doesn't like kittens and kites and kids in black American Apparel onesies silkscreened in Seattle?

I'm just waiting on the Naj.

A rear derailleur shifting gears on a shifter bike. Skipping and jumping ADHD like a brand-new chain on a worn out cassette. 

After this special presentation we will return you to our regularly scheduled program and join Friday already in progress. Please return to your cubicles with your biodegradable clamshells full of daily specials. If you don’t have a cubicle, go out there a win one for the Gipper 


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horseshit

February 25, 2010

Don't sweat the small stuff and everything is horseshit

take it easy Sugarbear                    

word


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Rumberg has a posse

February 25, 2010

toeing the line between participant and observer
pulling out a camera changes everything
going from one of us to one of them


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there once was a man from Racine

February 24, 2010

please press hard you are making 3 copies

had a dream I was a messenger in Seattle
sitting in the lobby of a 55-story office building
25 minutes and not one messenger went by
but it was not a dream

straddling the line between One and Two Union

had a dream I was sleeping
in the passenger seat of a parked car
and still got “pulled-over” by a cop
on parade duty who had nothing better to do

do what you do as if you didn’t have to

had a dream I was sleeping and woke up
in a shower curtain factory     the smell
didn’t bother me but being hassled by
Rick Steves made me speak Chinese

toeing the line between participant and observer

had a dream I was sleeping
the clock was blinking 12:00  12:00  12:00
couldn’t tell if it was getting dark or light
couldn’t tell if she was coming or going
couldn’t tell if she was a he
but I knew it was time to leave

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720°

February 23, 2010

is it half full
or half empty
like 720 Olive
with 50% vacancy

round and round
full circle twice
720°
coming back around
like used bike parts

the Bike Swap is Saturday and

in other news...this just in

Hugh MacLeod cartoon

Tuesday looks a lot like Monday
but it smells a little better


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consumer confidence chitterlings

February 21, 2010

two more than a few screws loose
a blown fuse    a circuit short
wires crossed hither and thither
here and now    beans and toast    trial and error     
and  or a systematic process of elimination  
the jobs get done
eventually but it’s obviously
not about efficiency although
it feels like it should be    in this business
of immediate urgent package delivery
have you seen the Naj?
rationalized and justified ambidextrously
in the margins of utility    blissfully ignorant denial
unhealthy attachment to the ephemeral
individual and disposable with liberty and justice for all
unique to the mass-produced masses
tenderfoot grape juice on ice
to entice the fruit fly    lying in wait
to hibernate     through the winter
to sleep perchance to dream
until conditions are right    
     
right

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nobody says thither anymore

February 19, 2010

my very educated mother just showed us
every good boy does fine                      
but what about the nine pizzas?

it’s like diaper rash on your eyelids
it’s like playing cards with Cory’s brother’s kids

did they start out that way
and end up like this?
or
did they start out this way
then end up like that?

as well as   other timeless questions
regarding the human condition
neither here nor there but somewhere
between restriction and liberation

thither and thither and thither

we’ve isolated the source of the odor
frozen fish sticks thaw in direct sunlight

tah  tah  tee-tee  tah
tee-tee  tee-tee  tah  tah

while authorities await toxicology test results, an unnamed source within the department stated that alcohol could have been a contributing factor. Malcolm Gladwell just as well as any kid off the street could tell you that there were a number of other factors contributing.      Duh

the handrail slathered in lemon Pledge
leaves a little residue      to take with you
a souvenir    so to speak


the handrail was installed for your safety, please keep one hand on your business and the other one free in the event that we encounter unexpected turbulence or a sudden loss in cabin pressure…if your eyes go fuzzy and your knees buckle then you may find yourself in the dark on the floor of the bathroom in your girlfriend’s apartment
and you may ask yourself
how did I get here?  

postnasal drip hits harder on the elevator

join the club   take a number
vitamin D deficiency
get in line    you’ll be fine

ants in my pants and piss poor posture
precipitated by years and years of use and abuse
in and for   by and by   a one-shoulder messenger bag

no regrets  in retrospect                    still
wouldn’t want your job
on a day like this

borrowed  stolen  cited  quoted
recycled  paraphrased  plagiarized       hyperlinked

a brown bag shed from an expired roadmaster
tumbleweeds down the alley and into the street
on the stiff morning breeze that slices through layers
like a wood handled pizza cutter
calling into question wardrobe decisions
made nine minutes ago
with nine more hours to go

thither


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is there a Starbucks around here?

February 18, 2010