she who run fast catch crowded elevator stop on every floor
she who slow catch the next one get there faster
spit gum on sidewalk
get gum on shoe
there's a force in the universe I like to think of as the shut-the-fuck-up force that comes around for those that talk too much about never getting flat tires or always this or never that until things come around and even out and then those big talkers get the message and shut the fuck up
hose clamps and duct tape. these are a few of my favorite things. not much experience with pvc but I've seen the hundreds of fittings available at the local hardware store and it's like a toy store with too many choices. I pulled this off a donated bike and I've had it hanging on the wall since because it symbolizes the diy spirit of bikes that appeals to me. the self contained independence of riding to work or riding anywhere on your own schedule. even when bikes don't work quite right they work pretty well and if you can't find what you're looking for then make it yourself. I'm not exactly sure what this person made here but they put some time and effort into it and I bet it got the job done.
it's still true eight years later but now you have a new perspective
constantly maintaining a professional appearance with consistent locknut lip clearance. Sweet & sour pork triple clamp fork front suspension of disbelief. Loose balls, bearing jars of pickled herring. Brass nipples shits and-or giggles. Crank arm extractor. Ask Greg Vogel about the chicken tractor. Nine dollar gourmet cupcakes. Poorly adjusted cantilever brakes. Headset press. Barefoot summer dress.
Cycling computer. Psycho commuter. Hose-clamped milk crate douche bags expecting respect from bungee-corded pickle bucket Dexter Avenue warriors. Fluorescent yellow jackets lineup. That light was red suck up. Heads up. On your left all around. Fixed gear conversion virgins whack track standing. Vehicular cyclist charade. Late-November chuffer parade.
Thin ice. Poor advice. T-shirt tan. Window fan. Be kind please rewind. Your credit card has been declined. Forget full retailing smooth sailing. Forty hour work week too much tongue in cheek.
It will all make sense behind a white picket fence.
this bike rolled in with lots of mismatched parts and a blownout fork. the rat trap rack secured with a shoelace and a piece of plastic laminate wedged under the plastic crate to act as a fender. it had a 25.4 seatpost just floating in the seat tube.
I got it down to the frame saving only the cranks and then I started over. Installing a threadless fork and quite a few new parts complimented by some trusty used ones.
as president of the Profile Design cup holders club easing seamless transitions along the coffee-beer continuum it pains me to be seen in public with an unsightly strap-on bottle cage like this. However it's wicked hot out and I'm a little more thirsty than usual on my short commute to work and this frame has no bottle cage bolts. when the temperature goes back below 90 I will most likely remove this thing. or bust out a bunch of zipties duct tape pvc pipes popsicle sticks and twine in the DIY bike commuter spirit of home-baked-half-assness perhaps drill the shit out of the frame and use some sheetrock screws to get that bottle cage to rattle around and kind of stay on there just a little cockeyed.
give them an inch and they'll take 150mm plus or minus 5 as your aspect ratio has slowly changed over the past 20 years and this stem will no longer fit onto your screen without losing something in the adjustment want to come downstairs and checkout my Control Tech stem collection?
I'll be looking for an opportunity to bring this stem back to the streets of the 98118 in the next six weeks on an urbanized mountain bike refurbished for the consumer with a set of really really swept back bars more upright and more laid back no need to dive out to that flat bar like Graeme Obree's superman on a 24 inch toptube with a stem stretching out another country mile over a blownout mag 21.
ten years later the only thing that's changed is I'm charging $7 more for shipping and handling and I'm using American Apparel shirts now and I most likely will not deliver your shirt by hand directly to your place of employment bike messenger style. I'll drop it at the post office. in 2006 I used to ride around to local bike shops with a bag full of shirts and try to sell them to poor underpaid bike mechanics.
over the past several years of diminished pilderwasser shirt production this is the one shirt I've gotten requests for from repeat customers repeatedly.
here it is. send money. $27 that is. paypal does the trick. firstname.lastname@example.org.
you can have any color you want as long as it's black
you can have any size you want as long as it's XL*
*other sizes available:
understated dignified classic colorways that can take a beating
there are some other classic pilderwasser designs available but I don't play games so you can tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you'll get
at my shop you can order any foo-foo espresso drink you want and I'll take your order with a smile and hand you a cup of black coffee and there are 17 tap handles at the bar so order whatever beer you want however all those taps are connected to the same keg of IPA.
the other day the month before the month before this I went to Venice Beach and wandered around aimlessly intentionally walking down Abbot Kinney the hippest street in the USA and all I remember is some pretty good coffee in a shop selling $180 sunglasses as well as visiting briefly the Linus bike shop and passing by the Rapha shop that I could not even think about getting close to but closer to the actual Venice Beach I ran into this guy and that guy keeping in mind that these photos below are 4 -9 years old they are here to get the point across. there were no tweets no instagram or facebook live or snapchat but I learned that there actually is a lot of snapchat and google there as in there goes the neighborhood. real estate. abbot kinney. dog town. cycles. cyclical. canals.
this guy has somehow figured out the quality of life issues in LA since he left Seattle
that guy has gotten things dialed-in in LA as well
only at Bike Works does a Bridgestone like this show up really dusty and crusty but sound rolling 27 inch wheels rear dropouts spaced 126mm and where two months earlier a cycling enthusiast donated a hand built 27" wheel set of modern hubs laced dangerously yet enthusiastically under-tensioned to new Sun M18 rims the rear hub spaced to 126mm with a fine 6 speed freewheel already installed in that place where these wheels hung on or near the ceiling waiting for their chance and finally it all came together topped off with a six speed thumb shifter of course.
I replaced every single thing on this bike except the brake calipers.
Univega Alpina s6.3
the marblized reptilian greenish gold & black splatter paint job is actually amazing and a photo can not do it justice and as you know I've always been a big fan of the oversized bi-axial power oval and the bent chainstays on vintage Univegas. I replaced the suspension fork that used to offer up to 25.4mm of travel. I also swapped several other key parts on this rig to make into the ultimate urban adventurer.
Just around the corner from catastrophic failure not just some jackass bike mechanic making fun of unsuspecting customer’s bikes on instagram this is my seat post the one I rode to work today and yesterday and off and on here and there for the past 17 years since I bought it used at Recycled Cycles back when they actually sold used bikes and used bike parts. Yesterday I thought my saddle was creaking up a storm and I thought it was the ti rails in the seatpost clamp that I haven’t really touched or even looked at for years because I hardly ever ride the Soma anymore. I’m sure there have been some creaks coming from that bike in the past few years but I’m really good at compartmentalizing and the harmonic dissonance of old full fenders rattling takes center stage or takes over like smooth white noise. Someday a real rain will come and silence all the creaks and squeaks for a little while then they’ll all dry out and be even worse than before. A reliable maintenance schedule could be turning up the music a little bit louder. Just ignore it, it will all go away some day. Last night in the dark garage after the kids went to sleep I greased the shit out of the clamp and the bolt and the rails and slapped it all back together and turned off the light as there aren’t many test rides around here only rides to work this morning I hopped on and rode to work and the fucking saddle seemed to be creaking even more than before so when I got to the HoneyComb Hideout I yanked the post out and finally noticed the crack the big big crack with the big big creak that’s been trying to tell me something for years.