I’m not here to share saliva spraying stories of Ritchey Logic cranks or announce my recent induction into the International Brotherhood of MKS Grip King Geeks although the internet makes it really easy to find like-minded bike dorks and get in a daisy chain line of back-patting self-affirming looping feedback loops.
We are gathered here today to talk about this thing called cup holders. You’ve heard how cup holders can be the deal breakers on $115,000 SUVs. Bottle cages are cup holders on bikes and the ones that can actually hold a coffee cup or a beer can as well as a water bottle are the best. Transitioning seamlessly along the coffee-beer continuum from road masters to americanos and back again all on the seat tube.
I'm starting the Profile Design Cup Holder Club even if I'm the only member and I'm not looking for a pat on the back like when you ask me about my weekend not because you care but just because you want me to ask you about yours but I don't care about your weekend so I don't ask we can skip the horseshit I'm telling you about my bottle cages instead of asking you how you feel about your bottle cages in a roundabout dilly dally touchy feely Portlandia way.
Understated simplicity flexibility versatility and durability make these bottle cages my favorite and their abundant accessiblilty and hand-me-down availability in the Greater Puget Sound area also helps. They don't detract from your bike by screaming out for attention and they're not trying too hard to match your bar tape - cable housing - fluffy do dad ensemble. (if I did have bar tape it'd be black)
Before I got my hands on a Profile Design cup holder I would pry open conventional bottle cages and gently place my coffee cup inside and try to ride until the lid popped off and it splashed all over my legs on the way back to 1111 3rd for the 27th time since noon.
I haven't even ridden my next-next RAGBRAI bike yet because it doesn't have brake cables but it does have TWO Profile Design bottle cages.
that RB-2 was my first RAGBRAI ride
the Rob Roy was my second
this Allez will be my next-next