what was that? is that all there is? who is this? this is it.

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snot rocket surgery

September 8, 2022

I wasn’t standing on a corner

I wasn’t in Winslow Arizona  

It wasn’t such a fine sight to see

 

nonetheless, the memory is sticking with me 

 

I was pulling up to the bike rack just south of my favorite brewpub in the 98105 when I saw a kid on a shitty mountain bike riding  down the sidewalk with his lunch in one hand. (when I say “kid” I mean college age)  Just then the bartender walked out with a pint for a customer sitting in the streatery. Kid-on-bike hits the bartender,  but she is such a pro, she maintains possession of the pint and only spills a little splash. She calmly scolds the kid by saying “ride in the street next time” then she tells the customer that she’ll be right back after she tops off his beer. 

 

After locking up I stepped inside to purchase a tall can to take the edge off my pending train ride. I complimented the bartender for the way she stayed calm and the way she held onto that glass.  I am filled with a deep and sincere appreciation for servers and bartenders that are really good at their jobs. I know a good one when I see it, and that’s not only because I’ve been sitting on barstools for 33 years. My old lady is a life-long server. She kicks ass at it, and it shows. Those in-the-know know and she gets compliments all the time from people in the service industry. I spent a little time working behind the bar and I understand what bartenders are juggling all the time. 

 

At the same time I have no sympathy for those that ride bikes and scooters on narrow sidewalks at unsafe speeds. I’m not worried about those jackasses getting injured. I’m worried about the unsuspecting people strolling on the sidewalk, because that’s what sidewalks are for: oblivious pedestrians sauntering around.   The Ave was wide open when kid-on-bike with lunch launched down the sidewalk like a dumbass. 

 

The U district is home to over 30 restaurants, cafes and bars. Many of them now have outdoor seating and streateries set up. And as you probably know, the U district is also home to very narrow, piss-soaked, trash-strewn skanky little sidewalks and they’re even more choked down now with tables and chairs set up for outdoor dining.  The sidewalk is no place to be riding a bike blowing through blind corners and doorways like a fucking fuck. It’s not rocket surgery bro. 

 


Add Comment

Old man ranting on 5th and Seneca@ 16:30 said...

Get in the fucking road you pussy!

Posted September 8, 2022 11:33 PM | Reply to this comment

the same old man driving his truck said...

get outta the road you fucking fuck

Posted September 9, 2022 09:28 AM | Reply to this comment

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