what was that? is that all there is? who is this? this is it.

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the golden hammer

December 12, 2019

When all you have is a hammer

Everything looks like a nail

 

When all you have is a PhD in bioengineering

Everything looks like a pile of discarded styrofoam 

 

When all you have is an unachievable ideal

Everything looks like a letdown 

 

When all you have is a scooter

Everything looks like a sidewalk

 

When all you have is a cone wrench

Looks like your pedals can stay on for awhile 

 

When all you have is zip ties

Everything looks like it’s coming loose

 

When all you have is facebook friends

Everything looks fake as fuck   

 

When all you have is a mission statement 

Everything looks like mission creep

 

When all you have is a u-lock

Everything looks like a bike rack 

 

When all you have is longneck bottles

Everything looks like a bottle opener 

 

When all you have is a bottle opener

Everything looks like a screw top 

 

When all you have is Amazon

Everything looks a click away

 

When all you have is chicken 

Everything tastes like chicken

 

When all you have is Kenny G

Shut the fuck up 

 

When all you have is a cornfield

Everything looks like a urinal

 

When all you have is urinal mints

Everything smells like the mens room 

 

When all you have is the Mens Room

Everything sounds like 99.9 KISW

 

When all you have is student loan debt

Everything looks like a credit card

 

When all you have is Coors Light

Everything feels like a headache  


Add Comment

pilder w asser said...

as you golden-hammer away on amazon this holiday season please take a moment to consider the people that will be taking your packages the final fifty fucking feet.

Posted December 14, 2019 09:13 AM | Reply to this comment

bret in abq said...

wordsmith.

Posted December 14, 2019 06:22 PM | Reply to this comment

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