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spectral analysis

July 6, 2018

on the spectrum

 

this phrase gets tossed around these days and I think it’s funny because I’m on the spectrum

 

we’re all on some spectrum because there’s a spectrum for everything

 

Melanin

Melatonin

Serotonin

Sarah Palin

 

there’s a spectrum for color into the absence of color

light or the absence of light

 

masculinity

facial hair brow ridge sagittal crest knuckle dragging

 

awkward socially to silky smooth any situationally

back slapping hand shaking small talking  

 

horseshitting

 

there’s a spectrum for everyfuckingthing

 

the super recognizers you’ve read about on one end of the facial-recognition spectrum with the face-blind people at the other end

 

there are people like Stevil that can’t tell you what day it is or make plans involving a calendar on one end of the perpetual calendar spectrum while on the other extreme there are people that can tell you what day of the week your birthday will fall on in 2027 as well as what day of the week you were born back back back then in that year that you were born

 

There are people that use a highlighter to cross things out and a paragraph later use it again to highlight things and they expect you to know what they mean if you know what I mean

 

There are people that input an exact time into the microwave to reheat their lunch in the breakroom and there are people that eat their food at room temperature with a smile

taken out of context

and put back in 

again

twice removed


Add Comment

pilder said...

don't forget the OCD hand washing spectrum and the chapstick panic spectrum

Posted July 9, 2018 10:08 AM | Reply to this comment

. said...

Spectrum analysis shows that a hand on the shoulder of the right person can lead to marriage, 2 kids and mortgage.

Posted July 10, 2018 09:53 AM | Reply to this comment

pilder replied to ....

Roger that. At specific spots on the spectrum that hand-on-shoulder is a major public display of affection

Posted July 10, 2018 10:56 AM | Reply to this comment

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