a quality of life issue

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slow boat

July 19, 2018

the other Tuesday I picked up a rather large box out in the 98115 and to bring it back into 98195 I used two long bungee cords to strap it on top of the cargo box. Rolling south I visualzed wind tunnel testing a cargo bike with a stack of boxes on top and it felt like this

that's not the Kirsten I had a crush on in high school that's Frederick Kirsten

finally, in conclusion, because I'm into product placement, brand recognition, consumer loyalty and buying locally I'd like to draw your attention to that slow boat water bottle from the Slow Boat Tavern in the heart of Hilman City. 

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July 18, 2018


I know a guy that knows a guy that organized a RAGBRAI-like little bike ride somewhere in the Chicagoland area and named his group pilderwhatever. 


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cable routing changes sunglasses stay the same

July 17, 2018

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the severity of the disparity

July 12, 2018

Darwin's Conjecture

was desperate
for proof
that animals wept.
It wasn’t enough
that houseflies hum
in the key of F
or that Dall sheep keep
lifelong their horns,
adding like trees
a ring each year.
Darwin wanted tears.

Being the only
species that weeps
was lonely,
thought Darwin,
of manic animals.
No, it wasn’t enough
that honey bees
can count to four.
Darwin wanted more.

Or less.
Confess it—
the reason why
humans cry
is the mess
they fashion
in comparison to
the paradise
they can imagine.
Animals, if
they imagine,
must be less
by the severity
of the disparity.
Or maybe they have 
less disparity.
Or less mess.

As to why
Darwin hoped
that animals cry
we can only guess—
which is a form
of imagining,
and could lead
to the emergence
of tears. Instead 
let us hum
in the key of F
and count to four
or more.
Or less,
and know
the aurora borealis
as glimpsed through
the fretwork of 
a construction crane
is a metaphor
for our brain
and also an analogy
for why we cry,
all the while—
like Darwin—
humming against
the immensity.

—Jessica Goodfellow


I read this on the...

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it's important to take a moment, stop and smell the hairspray

July 10, 2018

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summer time rolls XLIX

July 9, 2018

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spectral analysis

July 6, 2018

on the spectrum


this phrase gets tossed around these days and I think it’s funny because I’m on the spectrum


we’re all on some spectrum because there’s a spectrum for everything





Sarah Palin


there’s a spectrum for color into the absence of color

light or the absence of light



facial hair brow ridge sagittal crest knuckle dragging


awkward socially to silky smooth any situationally

back slapping hand shaking small talking  




there’s a spectrum for everyfuckingthing


the super recognizers you’ve read about on one end of the facial-recognition spectrum with the face-blind people at the other end


there are people like Stevil that can’t tell you what day it is or make plans involving a calendar on one end of the perpetual calendar spectrum while on the other extreme there are people that can tell you what day of the week your birthday will fall on in 2027 as well as what day of the week you were born back back back then in that year that you were born


There are people that use a highlighter to cross things out and a paragraph...

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Erma Bombeck Would Do What (EBWDW)

July 6, 2018

this made its way to me via Matt Case

the grass is always greener in Portland over the septic tank

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Le Tour

July 2, 2018

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right-swing left-swing

June 27, 2018

20 years ago I poached this from Mudflap and reprinted it in one of the first issues of kickstand

For about 15 years as a commuter and a messenger I wore a bag on my right shoulder. Always on my right shoulder. From T2 to PAC to DANK with a brief interlude to an Ortlieb backpack and some legal messenger time with a DANK backpack I'd say 14 of those 15 years a one-strap bag was tugging on my right shoulder wearing holes in the right side of my shirts and jackets altering my skeletal system and the muscles that support it. 

7.5 years ago I stopped wearing a one-shoulder bag but my right shoulder is still noticeably lower than my left and my right hip is noticeably higher than my left. 

20 years later this cartoon speaks to me in a new way.  

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