what was that? is that all there is? who is this? this is it.

Steve Young DANK BAGS Hella Corndog sent me this shot of Gigo at the Westside XXV in PDX. This photo speaks volumes. So many memories cyclically cycling full circle speaking to me. I shared it with Molly, who won that DANK bag in the Polka Dot Rocker in 2007. She rocked it for years then passed it on to Gigo.  Gigo and Fido are still rocking it. I shared it with Gigo and he shared his infatuation with polka dots. Rock on. 

as if

if only

what if

as if I was

if only I did

what if I am…

…working on a vehicle that goes back in time. Not forward. Only backward. Backward only like a neoretro time travel vehicle. To the untrained eye it appears to be a well-used Riese & Müller cargo bike. On the handlebar I’ve mounted three old Avocet cycling computers: PINK and YELLOW and BLUE. The retro cycling time traveler straddles the bike, enters the month, day and year into the corresponding computers, then rides around the corner, where they’ll enter a wormhole in the spacetime continuum and instantly arrive at the chosen date in their past life. 

The wormhole will be on hold for exactly 24 hours, allowing the retrocyclist to relive old memories or try new approaches and fully explore their phantom nostalgia. But only for 24 hours. Then they’ll be returned to their so-called “real life” reality. Where only a blink-of-the-eye went by. 

Any decisions made or actions taken in the wormhole will have no effect on the timeline, events and people in “real life”. However the retrocyclist will gain a new perspective on their past, leaving...

What’s with all the arrows bro?

Don’t you know which way to go?

And all those lower case gs?

Jeez Louise?

Jiffy corn muffin mix?

I heard those guys are dicks. 

what's your 20?

I'm at the PizzaHut

I'm at the TacoBell

I'm at the combination TacoBell PizzaHut 

are you sure you're not at the corner of

NE San Juan Road &

San Juan Road NE???

16oz Black Tea - Lemonade = $6.00 at coffee shop

BYO BTL = $0.25 

run the numbers

do the math

day in   day out

cost - benefit analysis

Two former messengers walk into a bar

The bartender says, “who’s Toto?”

sara g photo

The Participation Trophy Brewing Company doesn't actually make beer. 

But if they did, I'd buy it.

Freudian lisp

Freudian slip

Freudian lips

bilabial Freudian lisp

that’s no slip

that’s both lips

As you can see Freud’s lips are chapped. He’s been around the block a few times with a zip tie in his mouth securing him to my front hub. Before that he sat in a raised garden bed for a season or two.  I found a Freud bobble head doll in a free pile in the UW Psychology department in the middle of the covid years, and I’ve gotten my money's worth. 

Now Freud is looking up from under my saddle.

It seemed like a good idea at the time…

In 2012 Portland Design Works released the Dios Thronous saddle. The first of its kind, 100% injection molded EVA foam. The Crocs saddle. In black, green, white and “red”. But it’s not even close to red. It’s full-on pink.

I was completely unaware of this saddle, until there was a metric shitton of them at BikeWorks. PDW stopped making them. Bike shops couldn’t sell them.  They were kicked to the curb and donated. Bike Works could barely give them away. The word on the street was that they...